MY FIRST DEAL

well, i guess this isn't my actual first deal (my first attempt i was only 13 months old! its no wonder i wasn't able to charm those dogs- i mean, they're dogs!! what was i thinking!?)

let me rephrase: my first SUCCESSFUL deal

i was a mere 4 years old before i finally got a sorry sucker to shake my paw. a human, no less. it felt good to have power over one for once. anyway, i may have cheated a little. i got him plastered- but i had a good reason! see, this engineer was struggling to find anyone to take his work seriously. his stuff wasn't half bad, either. just an unlucky fella. i told him i could get his inventions and his name noticed because im a... "wish granting" demon. he said he'd never seen a demon before and didn't believe in them! or that i was one! or that i could grant a wish! even though i let him touch my horn with his gross human finger! so, how do i prove im no mortal? i drink four bottles of scotch in under an hour and live to tell the tale. this dumbass decided to try and drink with me. why? im not sure. to prove himself? whatever, needless to say i got that handshake before he stumbled into the streets.

did he get what he wanted? well, technically yes. i'd heard buddy died some years down the line and only after his death did professionals discover his research. he's a well known academic mind in that area of Europe to this day if i remember correctly... you're welcome, Victor! and world!